I have written extensively on our mental muscles in the past three weeks. The more I wrote, the more comments I received. What struck me about your comments and questions is that they were more or less the same. We all have the same level of the six mental muscles in us.
The only reason some of us are better than others in some fields is the amount of exercise we expose one or a combination of these muscles to, and thereby strengthening them to an impressive degree. Your intuition for instance – your capacity to share the vibrations in which another person is operating. When they are upset, anxious or excited, you can feel it even without them vocalising any of it. We’re all interconnected.
Research shows that on a genetic level, you and I are quite alike. We really are the same. Doctors can draw blood from one individual to add life to another. My eyes can be grafted into another’s sockets to grant them the gift of sight after am gone from this life. One of your kidneys could be grafted onto someone else’s chest cavity to literally save their life. So what differentiates us from each other? We may be similar in many ways, but we each have that difference, however slight, that makes us unique. That uniqueness manifests in our work, our business, life, everything, really. It may seem pretty insignificant but it is what makes the differences we exhibit. It is what places some of us way above others.
Are you in a position to articulate your uniqueness? Its is quite regrettable that most people live through their entire lives with negligible or no awareness at all of their uniqueness. Regrettable because its your uniqueness that differentiates the level at which you operate from the next person; your attitude, performance, growth, success and happiness.
In a service business where you’re selling yourself, not having access to this understanding means that many opportunities pass you by without your slightest realisation. And yet we are all in the service business. We all trade our expertise, well-honed experience, great attitudes (or not!) in one form or another. Knowing your uniqueness is vital to improving, positioning and pricing your service at the most rewarding level possible.
The clues to your uniqueness are everywhere. For instance someone may ask; “So what do you do?”. If you are a Brand Manager you’ll probably answer; “I manage XYZ brand at ABC company”.
Now, an answer like this doesn’t do much for your ability to attract greener pastures. It will probably mark the beginning of a rather dull and understandably short conversation with the other party without any social meaning let alone translation into anything more on the business or career end.
Knowing your edge and being able to put it into words succinctly greatly separates you from the rest of the pack, which is every other person.
Here are some suggestions; start by asking yourself the right questions and listen to your current responses. What is the big deal about you? Why would anyone hire you, partner with you, give you more responsibility, promote you, give you a raise, partner with you on a venture or simply listen to you? It may not be right away but the answers will come when you ask. If you like your answers, fantastic! The more important question is whether a significant party will think the same. If not, work on yourself, not your answers.
The single most common reason why articulating our advantage is so difficult is that most people simply don’t think of themselves very highly. We’re trained not to. Our conditioning fails to stress on elevating ourselves such that we are frowned upon when we vocalise our talents, give ourselves a pat on the back, offer ourselves for positions of leadership and so on.
If you haven’t already, it may take a while and some work before your unique selling point comes to you. It is work that is worth every effort.
To break out of the illusion that you are not special, unique, valuable and useful is a kind of freedom that is hard to describe.
It impacts greatly on your career, business and your life in general. It affects your own sense of worth. It affects the fees you charge or the remuneration you can command. It affects the calibre of employers and clients that you attract.
You most likely already have a clue about what your competitive edge is. But you’ve been trained to believe that if you actually said it, others might think you’re egotistical, or bragging, or full of yourself. Go ahead and do it, anyway. If you should need some help, find a good coach.
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