As we all know, the road to true love never did run smooth and relationships, no matter how great your other half may be, can always face obstacles. But when you encounter an issue, how can you work out whether your relationship just has a few cracks or if it’s completely beyond repair? According to Elizabeth Shaw, the CEO of Relationships Australia NSW, there’s one major – and common – sign that you should look out for.
Speaking to news.com.au Shaw explained how a big warning sign that a relationship is over is when “your concerns are automatically dismissed, minimised, denied or even ridiculed by your partner”.
As well as this, she also shared some other signs she thinks you should keep an eye out for. These include other people commenting that you seem “miserable” or that as a couple you don’t seem happy and not being able to remember the last time you were actually happy.
Another warning sign is that both you and your partner are aware of your issues – such as lack of sex, little emotional intimacy or increased arguing – but neither of you are willing to acknowledge the problems. The opposite problem can also occur, where you discuss your issues but then find yourself stuck in a “repetitive loop” which plays out the same way every time you talk and you don’t actually make any progress.
If you’re experiencing any of these problems in your relationship, Shaw explains there is still a way to recover from them – but it’s going to take some work. She says: “Although these are very negative experiences and worrying signs, in themselves they don’t have to signal the end of the relationship unless they don’t change. With new ways of looking at issues and bridging the divide created by poor communication and conflict resolution, you can take the heat out and build enough of a bridge to see what really is between you.”
The expert goes on to recommend seeking help from a couples’ counsellor who may be able to break you from your cycle of negativity. She adds: “Ultimately you have to ask yourself: if the trouble between us could change, do I still love, trust and respect my partner? Is there still something important between us? You need to have a reason to do the work because it won’t always be comfortable or easy.”
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